So lately, even with Matthew and I so happy, I feel like something bad is going to happen. Almost as if I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I don’t know how to make it better and I don’t know if he wants me in his future. 

We talked about it somewhat last night. And I told him about waiting for the other shoe to drop. He told me the other shoe will drop when I move away for grad school….

Does he really not expect us to work out?



today at work a little girl and her dad came through my line and she picked up two things of altoids and she was like “daddy let’s get the same flavor! so when you’re in afghanistan i can eat mine and you can eat yours and we can be together!” and me and my cashier just stood there like DON’T CRY DON’T FUCKING CRY DON’T BE A BABY AND FUCKING CRY

and then they left and we fucking wailed like children